I have been very blessed to earn many titles and “Mother” is by far my favorite. Well after Christian that is. And I guess being a wife to an incredible man is cool too.
But let’s stay focused here.
I love being a mom and it brings me an unimaginable amount of joy to raise my daughter, even on our rough days.
I’ve been very vocal about the struggles my husband and I experienced before having Chidera (check out My Journey To Motherhood Blog) and every time Mother’s Day comes around I stop and reflect on so much.
What I’m reminded of:
I am reminded of the sadness & frustration I felt during my season of wait and while experiencing loss.
I am reminded of just how little control we actually have during life’s precious moments like conceiving, pregnancy, and birth.
I am reminded to be very delicate with a woman’s feelings when asking about her child status.
I am reminded that God is faithful and answers prayers; my daughter is a testament to this.
I am reminded of the overwhelming sense of love, admiration, and gratitude I felt when I held my daughter in my arms for the first time.
I am reminded of the incredible blessing it is to have a mother who is alive and healthy.
I am reminded of the satisfaction of knowing that through my motherhood, I was blessed to make my husband a father.
Needless to say, every year Mother’s Day conjures up a lot of emotion.
A not so happy Mother’s Day
On this particular Mother’s Day, my heart especially went out to the thousands of women around the world who have a difficult time celebrating this day.
To the moms who’ve lost moms, angel moms, foster moms, moms in wait, incarcerated moms, struggling moms, and/or anyone who may find Mother’s Day difficult, I see you & I pray for a special covering over you.
We sometimes spend all our time celebrating “traditional” motherhood (if that’s even a thing) that we may forget that everyone’s story is different.
The same holiday that brings a smile to my face in 2022 was the same day that made me feel inadequate & isolated in 2018.
The same day that may be met with excitement for a new mother may make a woman who just lost a child feel awful.
The same day that allows one mom to have a pass to relax & be pampered may be a painful reminder to another mom of her lack of support or resources.
The same day that allows one mom to gather & fellowship with her children may be a difficult reminder to a mom going through a custody battle.
Showcasing these dichotomies can serve as a reminder to meet people where they are and give people the grace they deserve. Also remember that it can be extremely hard to understand how someone is feeling without taking a walk in their shoes.
For example, I may not have experienced the pain of losing a parent first hand, but I unfortunately do know the pain of having to disconnect from social media when all my age mates are posting heartfelt Mother’s Day posts and I was still in my season of wait.
And then a few years later, that same sad Tiff beams with satisfaction each and every time a stranger wishes me a “Happy Mother’s Day” because there were times when I doubted if I’d ever be able to experience motherhood.
A few days, months, or years can have a profound impact on your situation so please always remember that when you’re going through a hard time.
This doesn’t only apply to moms
If you’re an athlete battling an injury and doing your best to keep it together: this too shall pass.
If you’re a man who just lost his job and is trying to figure out how to provide for his family: this too shall pass.
If you’re a person going through a nasty breakup & can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel: this too shall pass.
Regardless of where you are at this very moment please always try to keep the faith and trust that it will get better. And yes, I know first hand that this is much easier said than done. But no situation is permanent, and I know how helpful it can be to be reminded that you’re not alone. We all have our battles that we are fighting silently, and if no one has told you today: you’ve got this.